Bittersweet

My last night in Paris. It's crazy that I've been in Europe for two weeks already and now I'm just going home. I loved it, though. It's beautiful and loud and old here and I can honestly see myself living here one day.
This vacation has also given me a much needed break from the total crap that was going on in the states. It's given me time to stew and think and realize that I honestly don't really care, you know? I guess I knew from the start that it wasn't going to last (I mean, really... and I was getting these bad feelings anyway) and I'm sort of certain there's some karma going on here, for the bad way I've treated guys in the past. Besides, there's that maturity issue that always bothered me anyways.
My knight of cups is on his way to me.
And he's not the person who kissed me the night before I left... uhh...
So, Paris has let me forget (and given me a dash of self confidence... the men here aren't afaid to stare if they think you're pretty) and relax. I also got a serious tan, which isn't the first thing I'd assume I was going to get, but between trekking the city under the hot sun every day and strolling the totally shadeless gardens of Versailles, those UV rays have done their job.
Speaking of Versailles, I feel like i've been there before. The whole time I kept thinking "I've walked these halls... I've visited this room..." It's not all surprising, I suppose. Everyone who was anyone moved to Versailles with Louis XIV so if I was in France and nobility, or even a servant, in that century in a past life, chances are I was there, too.
But that might be my imagination running completely rampant.
In any case, I will miss it here and I've decided to bring back Dette and Vieve. They'd like London more, I think...
I started my new story, inspired very much by the area around Honfleur but set in Scotland-- I've never been to Scotland... that and Italy are my next European goals. The story's got supernatural in it, as always. I think someday I should try to write something that could plausibly happen, but I think I shy away from it because I run to writing when I want to escape reality, you know? So any story without a hint of the fantastic doesn't hold my interest for long. Just a personal preference. I know a lot of people, including my father, who would rather read a non-fiction or realistic fiction novel over one with magic or monsters.
I'm a bit of a juxtaposition in that I love books like Abarat but cannot stand most books under the "Fantasy" section in the library. It makes shopping for me difficult but... eh. I'll buy my own books. Get me a certificate to Barnes and Noble.
Whoo... Well. I've been rambling. Not even sure how I got there.
I don't know why I'm doing this blog thing. I have nothing interesting to say. But, I suppose if there are those out there who are actually interested in me or who are voyeuristic and love reading random folks' random inner thoughts, this is the blog for them.
Or, it can be an online diary.
I think I like that.